50 followers? wooo!!!

Sweet! Thank you everyone for following me! You guys rock! I hope this picture of Borat and of 50 Cent make you feel good (get it, 50 Cent. 50 followers?! nevermind haha.)


VERY NICE!! I will think of you when I sleep with my sister



I grew this for you :3 I'm not crying, I just got something in my eye :')

Real Talk

You called my mommas house and what? girl, your momma shouldn't have to screen calls for me, real talk. and Watch yo mouth!

 R. Kelly is serious business. So much so that this wonderful creation, entitled 'Real Talk' should be listened to by everyone. I'm not sure about you, but this video just makes me want to finish my sentences with 'real talk' when I get in arguments. I just love how the song progresses. It starts off as a bit boring and corny, but exponentially increases in greatness as time goes by. Although this video rocks, I don't really approve of R. Kellys mustache. It's all thin and gross. Shave that shiz R. Kelly. Real Talk!


The Death of the Double Down

From Wikipedia: The Double Down contains "bacon, two different kinds of melted cheese, the Colonel’s 'secret' sauce... pinched in between two pieces of Original Recipe chicken fillets."

Think that's hardcore? Well this video begs to differ.


Epic Meal Time is definitely a sweet channel on youtube and if you like this video, go check 'em out sometime. I had difficulty choosing which video to actually post, because most of them are as equally great as this one.

The best thing you'll see today

 

It's kind of like robot chicken, although I think this is funnier. Check it out! You can watch all of them at http://5secondfilms.com/ :)

Caption this!

The new squid-hat allows the Pope to go out in public undetected

Scary Chuck Norris Facecake

I have yet to see a scarier cake. The chocolate chip cookie hair is a nice touch.


Enjoy not sleeping tonight

10 on 10

DASHING

Shameless Self-Promotion!

PWRMIX 002- DISCO SUCKS- MAX POWER by MaxPower889


Yeah. I'm a DJ. So are 50 of your closest friends. I practice a lot, and typically my mixs sound good, so I'm posting it. If anyone else has soundclouds, post 'em and I'll check it out. If I like a song, I might snatch it.


If you're listening, I hope you are enjoying the mix!

-Moustache Man

Tracklist:

some blende
uh some other stuff?
ELECTRO/DANCE/DISCO STUFF

50th Post: How To Properly Twirl a Moustache!

I'm serious. There's rules to this shiz. Momma always said, "if you're going to do something, do it right, or don't do it at all"

He twirled the moustache right. If only he could un-pierce his ears


(1) Between the thumb and forefinger of each hand, emulsify a small ball of mustache wax.
(2) Working from the inside of your mustache, spread the wax out toward the tips, using a comb if necessary.
(3) Roll each tip into a point between your fingers, bending the curled mustache into half circles that open toward your face.

Source: Esquire Magazine!

Babies with Moustaches

thug life (click, it's a .gif!)
sup?

lol!

future redneck

ola

zzZz

heh heh




Submit your own to EpicMoustacheBlog@gmail.com

Black Dynomite!

I rewatched Black Dynomite recently and it's hilarious! I definitely recommend it. The soundtrack is perfect too. It's a spoof on blacksploitation films, but done very well (unlike 'Scary Movie'). Here's the trailer to give you jive-turkeys a taste.






I noticed a lot of nods towards the classic blacksploitation film "Sweet Sweetback's Baadassss Song" (but that film is totally serious and definitely not as action packed. Really interesting soundtrack though, like very ambient noise).

'Rubber' coming to America

from IMDB:

"When Robert, an inanimate tire, discovers his destructive telepathic powers, he soon sets his sights on a desert town; in particular, a mysterious woman becomes his obsession."

Yeah, so the movie is about a tire who goes on a killing spree, and it's being released in America. Directed by Quentin Dupieux (Mr. Oizo).

Mr Oizo


The movie was only shown at Cannes film festival, but it will become available on VOD February 25th, and will be shown in select theatres across America April 1st

Here's the trailer in all its retarded glory:

Where is it?



Nietzche

he must have so many friends

Guards you from spilling coffee onto your 'stache

what are you looking at?

Ice Cube: badass mofo

come at me bro
We all know Ice Cube as a member of the notorious NWA, but did you know he plays the voice of "Officer Bowman" in Black Ops? He's pretty gangster as long as you forget that he was in "Are We There Yet?" (but I forgive him). Anyways, some real classic Ice Cube can be seen in the following video, " It was a Good Day".

Moustache Song - Biscuit Beats

Got sent this song from a youtuber by the name of biscuitbeats! Enjoy!

Deus Ex 3 + moustaches in the first few seconds = win!

With some of the ridiculously amazing looking game trailers that have been coming out recently, it really seems we'll need a better console than the xbox or ps3.

Red Dead Redemption + R Kelly = 9/10

A cool .gif from movember.com

Salvador Dali: Artist, Eccentric and Moustache Connoisseur

U Jealous?
As one of the more famous moustache connoisseurs to have ever lived, I decided to post a few notable paintings of his (other than The Persistence of Memory). From wikipedia: "Surrealist works feature the element of surprise, unexpected juxtapositions and non sequitur". For those who don't know, here's a few paintings:




Note how the swans turn to elephants in the reflection

Salvador Dali: "Dividing by Zero"

Unlike many other artists, Salvador was one of the only artists to become rich and famous while he was alive. Because of this, there has been a number of different (and very, very expensive) jewels and jewelry designed by him, all covered in rubies, gold, pearls, diamonds.

Worth more than yo grill.


pimp

If a Salvador Dali exhibit rolls into your town, go check it out!

On a semi-related note, I was watching The Onion News and saw this pretty surrealist sketch which I thought was really funny. Check it out!




Cheers!

A user submission!?

from a man with a good moustache, called infinitepizza

Submit your own moustaches to EpicMoustacheBlog@Gmail.com

Depressed? Grow a moustache



Justin Dead?!

 

Thanks Justin for being in CSI. You made all our wildest dreams come true, especially after disappointing the moustache community with the following picture





6 Steps to Growing the Moustache of Your Dreams

Einsteins knowing look says it all
Growing a moustache is no easy task. It takes perseverance, patience, and backbone. Show your friends (and especially your enemies) that you're better than them. Here's some easy steps to help start you on your journey.









Maybe next year
Step 1. Figure out your age.


Can you even grow a 'stache? Is it even a possibility for you? If your mom still folds your underpants, you probably can't. If girls still have cooties, you shouldn't be growing one in the first place.

Adopted? Well ask your fake parents to estimate. You should be at least (AT LEAST) 18 years old. Anything younger than that and it's just going to look patchy and gross.




This isn't a girl. Just a heads up.

Step 2: Figure out your gender

 If you're a male, continue to Step 3. This step should be pretty easy for most of us. If you can't get past this step, I suggest asking 5 strangers on the street to see which gender you most look like. Hopefully, most should know. Don't accept candy or enter any vans. Just walk away. Walk. Away.






Step 3: Which Moustache is Right for You?


Choosing the right 'stache is very important. You cannot start off wanting to grow a Box Car then switch to Trucker.  That's unthinkable! You will have disastrous results. Just don't. Figure out which moustache you want to grow and stick to it.

If you can't make up your mind, go for business man or undercover brother. Both are respectable. 



Step 4: Wait


Like all fine things in life, moustaches take patience and time, like a fine wine, or aged cheddar cheese.


That's the Spirit!
Here's some suggestions:
  • -Chop wood
  • -Buy a watch
  • -Eat bacon
  • -Find a wife (this becomes easier with a moustache though)
  • -Fight in a war
  • -Drive a truck
  • -Sleep (keep one eye open at all times)
  • -Buy scissors and a razor



 




Step 5: Taming the Beast


So the hair has started to grow, has it? good stuff. It's better to start taming the 'stache at the start rather than letting your face turn into a jungle then hacking through it with a machete (although the second option gets you man points).

Use scissors to trim the long bits, and a razor to cut the short bits. Don't use shaving cream. It only reduces irritation, and if you can't man through skin irritation; growing a moustache isn't for you. If you screw up this stage, cut it all off and go back to step 4.




Step 6: Welcome to Moustache Paradise

When your moustache reaches completion, you will start to notice slight changes. Arms and legs feel stronger, women seem suddenly attracted to your dangerous side, food tastes better than it ever had. Colours even start to look brighter. You've done it. You've done it brother. You've made us proud! You've made all of us proud!

Evolution

At first there's this


Which evolves (not unlike pokemon) into



which evolves (using either a Fire Stone or a Water Stone) into this


Inspector Gadget

One minute, Gadget is a friendly inspector, without a care in the world.






But when a mystery needs investigating, and infiltration through disguise is the only option available, Inspector Gadget devises only the most sophisticated of schemes to gather evidence

Brilliant!

This is the power of the moustache.

There is no otha

Pai Mei: A King Amongst Mere Mortals.


 For millennia, undignified men across the globe have yearned for the ability to grow badass amounts of facial hair, then shape it to show off their wisdom and power within. While many may try, only a choice few have ever been able to achieve the careful balance of patience, bravery, and inner-awesomeness to actually grow the hair of their dreams.

Pai Mei is one of these men.

His raw amount of eyebrow hair combined with the reconstruction of the classic Fu Manchu turns his boring, spherical monkey-like face into a thing of ancient power and virtue.

Submit any pictures of men who has achieved this godlike status to epicmoustacheblog@gmail.com
 





Could have been worse. 7/10
/facepalm